Hi, Reg. I loved your discussion of motivation! My two primary motivations for
singing solo are that I enjoy singing, and by that I mean: I love to hear myself
sing (ok, sometimes). I think the pleasure principle to oneself is important.
The second and more effective motivation of singing for others is that I am
convinced that since I sound good, I will give other people pleasure. If I were
not convinced of the second principle (that of giving pleasure), I doubt that I
would sing, thinking that I would only make people jealous and not happy! LOL!
Cindi from KY. (I am a music teacher and vocal coach, with no desire to perform
publicly at large, although the thought does cross my mind upon occasion and
usually quickly squelched due to my self-effacing quality. I have been asked to
sing for friends and I will do so, usually after preparing for it since my
memory for words is poor and I gotta practice, practice, practice to give a
public in-the-livingroom performance! However, if I were convinced that I needed
to sing publicly for money, I would need to give myself the old pep talk (as the
losing D.A.'s used to say in "The Practice," of telling myself how I'm better
than "most" others ... that I am giving enjoyment to the hearer ... and that I'm
getting paid for my performance. In fact, I often tell the parents of my
students (just so they don't think I want to work too much ... that I'm like
Mozart ... I work to make money!)
Reg Boyle <bandb@n...> wrote:Motivation.
Quite apart from how well each of us sings, the bigger question
is why do we do it? Is it a worthy use of our time? Is it selfish?
Why is she, with the poorer voice, so much more confident than I?
It has been said that motivation for anything in life comes from
FEAR or SELFISHNESS. The first is called negative motivation,
the second, positive motivation. I'm sure that this glib definition
makes many feel very uncomfortable. However I contend that it
is incorrect, biased and incomplete.
"Self destruction…Otherishness…Selfishness…Fear"…this is
what I contend is the full range of motivation with various other
mile posts within the spectrum. I view all this as a circle with
FEAR in the lower right quadrant; SELF DESTRUCTION in the
lower left quarter; SELFISHNESS in the upper right which leaves
OTHERISHNESS in the upper left. I apologies for the use of the
word "otherishness" but it is interesting that there does not
appear to be a flippant word for the opposite of selfishness. ;)
Fear. I suggest that healthy fear is in fact the ultimate
paralyzing trait with the motive of self-preservation.
It is the suspension of all thought and action that is not in my
own interest. It is therefore more selfish than ordinary
selfishness, which is why I put it on the other side of the
equation.
Self-destruction. This is the ultimate disinterest in self
preservation. This may be moderated to withdrawal.
Both of these are destructive in their affect. The first (fear),
causes you to become disillusioned with your efforts and
may then move you directly to the other mode, (destruction).
Self-destruction in singing, hopefully just causes you to give
up and become a bus driver. If you happen to have seen
the Robin Williams movie called "Patch Adams," you will
have seen all this in action.
I have also seen the term "fear of selfishness" used.
I cannot accept this term because to me it fails to recognize
the "selfishness of fear". It has been stultified by the assertion
that there are only two conditions.
"Otherishness", or concern for others, is just as healthy as is
"Selfishness", concern for oneself.
One cannot exist without the other.
Most motivation papers I have read seem to become
obsessed with the need to be selfish in order to get
more of what you seek for yourself. Few appear to recognize
that the more you give, the greater your return and the less
frequent the excursions into the two negative quadrants,
fear and self-destruction.
As an example or two, obsessive-compulsive falls between
the fear and the selfish motives. Obsessing with the need
to help others causes you to neglect yourself and ultimately
be of no use whatever to others.
This carried even further will lead to self-destruction.
It seems to me that in order to achieve our goals and stay
away from fear in particular, we need to take a mind shift
that sees us give more attention to the needs and desires of
others.
So THAT'S what children are for!!!!!!!!!!!
Regards Reg.
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