<< << I've started looking at dresses, but so far it seems everything I find is (a) sleeveless and (b) high-waisted. I think sleeveless is inappropriate for church; besides, I have a womanly figure (not fat, just voluptuous) and look *terrible* in these types of gowns. Have any of you ladies faced this problem? Any ideas on where I can turn for something different (I live in Houston, TX)? >> >>
Ooh, this is one of my favorite rants!
In my experience, if you are a woman over 40 any larger than a size 8 (or maybe a 10) you are going to have problems finding clothing for almost any situation--but recital attire is particularly difficult.
I searched for 2 years before I found my best dress--and it didn't come cheaply! I found it in a bridal shop--a beautiful blue dress with a lovely beaded top with a chiffon skirt.
I tried having a dress made, and it was an utter failure--the "tailor" as she called herself--was great as a seamstress but had no clue as how to FIT someone whose body doesn't conform to the "fashionista's" notion of beauty. (If you have breasts and hips, God help you!) She ended up ruining $250 worth of gorgeous Italian silk fabric, and I was in tears.
Like you, I am not obese (although I could stand to lose some weight), just full figured. I have large breasts and a definite waistline--two things that designers today apparently consider to be mutually exclusive. It's almost impossible to find something large enough to fit on top that doesn't make me feel like I'm wearing a parachute. And besides, I've never enjoyed the feeling of being swathed in tons of fabric. It makes me uncomfortable and self-conscious. I prefer more "constructed" clothing.
And I've also found that sizes are almost completely unpredictable. My closet contains everything from 12s to 16s--and they all fit. Go figure. But often, Misses sizes are too small, while women's and plus sizes are far too large.
Anyway, here are some of the things that I have learned along the way:
1. Plan far in advance. If your recital is 6 months away, you should be looking for your dress NOW.
2. Find a really good bridal shop, tell them what you need the dress for, and look through their samples to show them what you do and don't like. Then they can do some research for you, and order a dress in time to have fittings done, etc.
For example, I've found that many of the "mother of the bride" dresses are in very pale colors (because the mother doesn't want to upstage her daughter). But I wanted a more vivid shade (my coloring is very fair) because I wanted to have a more definite "presence" on the stage. I knew that I wanted to show off my waistline, and that I wanted a bit of decolletage--nothing too deep, but no high necklines--and I wanted long sleeves. (The dress I finally found has sheer, beaded sleeves). I also wanted something that could span the seasons--no velvets, etc. I also wanted a skirt that had some movement to it--and that would not be constricting when I walked onstage or took a bow.
3. Contact the costume department of local opera companies. If they use professional costumers, these are most likely people who are accustomed to dressing SINGERS--people who need to BREATHE, who don't slouch, don't necessarily need gigantic shoulder pads, etc.
4. Separates can be a good way to go. There are lots of beaded tops out there, and I see lots of really beautiful skirts. (BTW, I am considering having the "ruined" dress transformed into a skirt, then making a coordinating top.)
5. Try shopping online. I found one really interesting site for "full figured women"--don't laugh! It's by Delta Burke (from Designing Women) and the evening wear selection is really quite interesting--and affordable too. I haven't actually purchased anything, but I told a friend who has since bought an outfit that she is just thrilled with.
Here's the address: http://store.yahoo.com/realsize/index.html Click on "Shop for Evening Wear."
6. If you find something that works, BUY IT! Don't assume that it will be there when you come back. If you do a lot of concerts, I think it's a good idea to keep a little "slush fund" (or at least, available plastic) for spur-of-the-moment purchases.
It also helps to keep in mind that department stores, etc. are WAY ahead of the season, so if you are shopping for a winter dress in December, your selection will be severely limited--you should have done your shopping in August or September!
ARRRGH!
Judy
|