Lisa-Marie wrote:
>>It is though extremely painful for me to be reminded of the successful time in
m
y life. I feel as though I wasted too much time, that I failed, that I let down
the people who believed in me. And I get SO JEALOUS of young singers, I can ju
st taste the bile in my mouth about it. I hate this. I don't want to feel this
way and I am never quite sure what to do with these feelings.
Does anyone else have these feelings? Or am I just a miserable, selfish person?
+++
First of all, you must not be ashamed of any feelings you have (even if you
would rather not have them!). Feelings are a barometer of what's going on
inside you, and they are important. If they are troublesome, as these are,
then you need to find a way to work thru them. A good therapist can help, or
a good friend who will listen and reflect things back to you, so you can see
where you are. There are always a lot of "Why?"s behind our feelings and our
statements about our feelings. Why do you feel time was wasted? Why do you
feel you failed? Whom did you fail? Etc. Often we find that we have these
feelings because we were trying to live up to someone else's expectations for
us...or false expectations that we set for ourselves, based on others' wishes.
I don't like to feel jealous of others myself, but when I do feel that way
(which happens quite often!), I try to get to the bottom of what's really going
on, because that's what has to be dealth with before I can stop feeling
jealous. We humans are wondrous creatures!
|\ Dr. Diane M. Clark, Assoc. Prof./Chair of Music Dept., Rhodes College
| 2000 N. Parkway, Memphis, TN 38112, 901-843-3782, dclark@r...
() http://gray.music.rhodes.edu/musichtmls/faculty/dclark.html
|
